"A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver." Proverbs 25:11. Earlier today, I had the choice to respond or react to a negative person. Someone told my mom she was too old to go back to school. This statement angered me so much! I wanted to, without thinking, tell this person exactly how I felt about them, tell them how ignorant that I thought they were, and just completely say my mind. That was my first instinct. It would have been a "reaction" that would have made my character even worse than the person that said it. The person that said it probably did not even realize what they were saying.
I stopped and thought to myself, how many times have I said something ignorant like that without thinking? Sure, maybe something I said was not that mean, but I do not know that person's motives. That is, after all, a common assumption made by negative people. A common assumption that so many of us believe is that we are too young, too old, too dumb, too smart, too ugly, too anything to accomplish what we want. The list goes on and on. We buy into this negative all the time! That's exactly what negative people want, too. Negative people want you to be just as negative as they are. They say things, even subconsciously, that want to bring you down to their level. They are dream-stealers, trying to get you to be as mediocre as they feel.
Too often, we let these negative people rule our thoughts and actions. For example, what if I had posted a Facebook status saying exactly what I thought in that moment of anger about that person. What good would it have done? What if I had called them by name publicly? What would that have caused? Sure, for a moment it may have made me feel better. But that would have been a fleeting feeling, that would only ruin my reputation and character. It would have made me negative, and it would have put me in a completely negative mindset. I would have been letting that person dictate the way I felt. I would have been letting a reaction win, rather than taking time and simply responding.
So how do we, in our own lives, cut the negative and not be the people that spur these problems? Like the verse I mentioned at first, we "fitly speak" our words. We choose correctly what we say and how we say it. Is this always easy? Will we always succeed? Maybe not, but we should definitely try. I guarantee by trying, we will become better versions of ourselves. If someone is struggling, like how my mom feels she is with school, we should be uplifting. If someone is working hard toward a goal, do not say they cannot do it, but rather encourage them to work harder. And if people are being more successful than you? Rather than be jealous of them, why not have a conversation with them and learn something, so that you can be more successful as well? It will only benefit us to learn from those smarter than we are. And I guarantee, the smartest people in life, they are not done learning.
If we are the people being positive, how do we correctly respond to those being negative? Well, I feel that if you think it was a matter that needs to be addressed, go to them privately. And when you do, do not come at them with the same negativity you received. The only thing that kills negativity is positivity. If you come at them angry and just wanting to get things off of your mind, you are only going to cause a lot more problems. Put yourself in their shoes and realize you do not know everything yet either, and you may make mistakes. It is very important to respond rather than react. The Bible says, "Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath," (James 1:19) and "Seest thou a man that is hasty in his words? there is more hope of a fool than of him." (Proverbs 29:20). When we allow others to dictate our emotions, we give them control of our attitude, and even our actions. We need to take control of our emotions, and we do that when we think on matters before we respond. I even heard one time that the great Abraham Lincoln used to write letters to people who made him angry....then destroy them. He would do that to state how he felt, but then he would take control of his emotions and actions and destroy them. He would not ever share the letter with the person who had angered him, and by the time he spoke with them, he knew how to correctly handle the matter, or he may not have even addressed the issues at all. Think of how awesome a man he was, and how much negativity he was sure to have received, and he did not let it run his life. He learned to respond to negative events in his life, and became arguably one of the greatest Presidents we have ever had.
One final point I want to make is, if you have some person in your life who is chronically negative, avoid them at all costs. The only way that you will grow is to surround yourself with people who want to grow as well. It is also a lot easier to learn to respond if the people you are surrounding yourself with are "responders" as well. Negativity breeds negativity, and the people you are around mold your way of thinking. Find the "Lincolns" in your life, and learn all you can from them.
Monday, November 25, 2013
Monday, November 18, 2013
Getting Out of the Noise
Psalm 40: 1-2 says, "I waited patiently for the Lord; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry. He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings."
I read these verses, like normal, and was about to move on to verse 3, when I noticed that "an horrible pit" had an "a" beside of it. Since it caught my eye, I looked to the middle of my Bible where it said what that a meant. It said, "Heb. a pit of noise". I stopped my reading, and just pondered on this for a minute.
"A pit of noise". Now, I am not by any means some Hebrew scholar, but when I see the phrase, "a pit of noise", I think of some dark, decrepit dungeon, that is overwhelmed by the noise of people. Not necessarily just random noises, but I think of people shouting, I think of people discouraging you, maybe even someone tearing you down. When I think of a pit of noise, I think of maybe in that dark dungeon, your own thoughts overwhelm you. Negative thoughts, discouraging thoughts, that create a noise even louder than someone shouting in your ear. Maybe no one else is in that dungeon, but you and your own insecurities and fears.
So, while I was reading this, those verses struck my heart. If you will notice, his goings were not established, and his feet were not upon that rock, until the Lord brought him out of that pit. This made me wonder what noises were holding me back in my own life. This made me question what "miry clay" was keeping me from progressing down the path the Lord has for me. Is there something I am listening to or letting overwhelm me?
If we are honest with ourselves, we all can say that there are probably some negative people in our lives, people who want to tear you down, and stop you from reaching your goals. They think that just because they have not accomplished their goals, no one else should either. With these people, we need to avoid them at all costs. It is kind of like the Bible verse that says, "evil communications corrupt good manners". In the same way, negative thoughts corrupt positive thoughts, and negative actions corrupt your positive goals. There are some people who may overwhelm you with their "noise", but if you want to get to the place that God has for you, you have to take action to avoid that kind of influence, and God will bring you out of that situation.
More important than those around us, though, is the negative noise we often place upon ourselves. We can have the most positive, uplifting people around us, and still be wallowing in our pit of noise. For example, in my life, for so long i've been told that I cannot do it all. I've been told that it is impossible for someone to be successful in their career, as a wife, as a business-owner, as a writer; etc, (fill in the blanks with anything you could want to be/accomplish) all at one time. For so long, it has been ingrained in me that we have specific things we are to do, and we cannot multi-task these roles. I'm not placing blame on anyone-you choose what you believe-but, irregardless i've had these false assumptions for a while. For a long time, I have just assumed that I was the "intellectual type of girl" (And really what does that even mean?) that goes to school, has a career, and knows nothing about home-making, or really anything outside of the field I have chosen. I never would admit that, but when asked about certain things, I would simply say I was not "good" at whatever it was. Insecurities and doubt of my ability just validated my negative thought process.
How terrible is it to have those kinds of attitudes? In fact, some of you, like me, have let fear and doubt win, and may say to yourself, "She is crazy. You cannot possibly have it all. You cannot be everything for everybody." And that's where we go off track: Don't be everything for everybody, be what you want to be for God, and then yourself. If we let go of those noises we keep on replay all day long, and finally be determined to reach our goals, we can succeed. We should figure out what we want, and work towards it in the time we have. Think about things you may have wanted to accomplish for a while, but something, some noise has held you back. What if you, with everything you had, tried to accomplish your goals? What is the worst thing that can happen? Failure? Failure is not always a bad thing, and sometimes it even gives you perspective on how to change what you are doing to be successful the next time. And what happens if you succeed? You can be all of the things God has for you. Like I said before, once he got out of that pit, the Lord established his goings. (And the word "goings" is plural, which indicates more than one...it can be more than one thing) The Lord led him exactly where he needed to be, once he was out of that pit. And, just like the verse said, The Lord brought him out of it. If we placed these doubts and fears aside, and trusted the Lord, He is more than willing to help us, and to give us direction. I am by no means perfect either, but this is something that I am working on in my own life. It is so important to identify the "noise" in our lives, and to move from there. You can be everything God has for you, you've just got to get out of the noise.
I read these verses, like normal, and was about to move on to verse 3, when I noticed that "an horrible pit" had an "a" beside of it. Since it caught my eye, I looked to the middle of my Bible where it said what that a meant. It said, "Heb. a pit of noise". I stopped my reading, and just pondered on this for a minute.
"A pit of noise". Now, I am not by any means some Hebrew scholar, but when I see the phrase, "a pit of noise", I think of some dark, decrepit dungeon, that is overwhelmed by the noise of people. Not necessarily just random noises, but I think of people shouting, I think of people discouraging you, maybe even someone tearing you down. When I think of a pit of noise, I think of maybe in that dark dungeon, your own thoughts overwhelm you. Negative thoughts, discouraging thoughts, that create a noise even louder than someone shouting in your ear. Maybe no one else is in that dungeon, but you and your own insecurities and fears.
So, while I was reading this, those verses struck my heart. If you will notice, his goings were not established, and his feet were not upon that rock, until the Lord brought him out of that pit. This made me wonder what noises were holding me back in my own life. This made me question what "miry clay" was keeping me from progressing down the path the Lord has for me. Is there something I am listening to or letting overwhelm me?
If we are honest with ourselves, we all can say that there are probably some negative people in our lives, people who want to tear you down, and stop you from reaching your goals. They think that just because they have not accomplished their goals, no one else should either. With these people, we need to avoid them at all costs. It is kind of like the Bible verse that says, "evil communications corrupt good manners". In the same way, negative thoughts corrupt positive thoughts, and negative actions corrupt your positive goals. There are some people who may overwhelm you with their "noise", but if you want to get to the place that God has for you, you have to take action to avoid that kind of influence, and God will bring you out of that situation.
More important than those around us, though, is the negative noise we often place upon ourselves. We can have the most positive, uplifting people around us, and still be wallowing in our pit of noise. For example, in my life, for so long i've been told that I cannot do it all. I've been told that it is impossible for someone to be successful in their career, as a wife, as a business-owner, as a writer; etc, (fill in the blanks with anything you could want to be/accomplish) all at one time. For so long, it has been ingrained in me that we have specific things we are to do, and we cannot multi-task these roles. I'm not placing blame on anyone-you choose what you believe-but, irregardless i've had these false assumptions for a while. For a long time, I have just assumed that I was the "intellectual type of girl" (And really what does that even mean?) that goes to school, has a career, and knows nothing about home-making, or really anything outside of the field I have chosen. I never would admit that, but when asked about certain things, I would simply say I was not "good" at whatever it was. Insecurities and doubt of my ability just validated my negative thought process.
How terrible is it to have those kinds of attitudes? In fact, some of you, like me, have let fear and doubt win, and may say to yourself, "She is crazy. You cannot possibly have it all. You cannot be everything for everybody." And that's where we go off track: Don't be everything for everybody, be what you want to be for God, and then yourself. If we let go of those noises we keep on replay all day long, and finally be determined to reach our goals, we can succeed. We should figure out what we want, and work towards it in the time we have. Think about things you may have wanted to accomplish for a while, but something, some noise has held you back. What if you, with everything you had, tried to accomplish your goals? What is the worst thing that can happen? Failure? Failure is not always a bad thing, and sometimes it even gives you perspective on how to change what you are doing to be successful the next time. And what happens if you succeed? You can be all of the things God has for you. Like I said before, once he got out of that pit, the Lord established his goings. (And the word "goings" is plural, which indicates more than one...it can be more than one thing) The Lord led him exactly where he needed to be, once he was out of that pit. And, just like the verse said, The Lord brought him out of it. If we placed these doubts and fears aside, and trusted the Lord, He is more than willing to help us, and to give us direction. I am by no means perfect either, but this is something that I am working on in my own life. It is so important to identify the "noise" in our lives, and to move from there. You can be everything God has for you, you've just got to get out of the noise.
Monday, October 28, 2013
Is Youth Wasted on the Young?
"Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity." This Bible verse resonated with me a lot today. Earlier, I had a conversation with a lady about my nursing classes. I was saying that Anatomy and Physiology was really easy to me, especially compared with the difficult workload I was taking now. She stated back, "Well that's just because you have a young mind. Things come easier for you." I just nodded my head in agreement, as she is not the first person to have said that, and just went on with the conversation. But, I could not get the conversation out of my mind. She was basically saying, "The only reason you did well in school is because you are young."
I thought of this, and then I thought of the fact that so many times people use youth as general reason for people's actions, successes, and failures. For example, there are many young people I know that have drifted from the faith they once had. I have heard it said many times, "Oh, they're just young. Sowing their wild oats. They all do it." Youth is usually seen as a weakness. It's a time in life where you are supposed to have the best memory functioning, but the decision making part of your brain might not be at its finest moment. Stereotypically, youths are supposed to think they know it all, and make plenty of mistakes in the meantime. And if you are a young person who has miraculously done right things, or gone to school and succeed in it, well that's just because you have a young mind. Even George Bernard Shaw said, "Youth is wasted on the young." And he must be right....right?
Before I sound off on my thoughts on the issue, I am taken back to that Bible verse, in I Timothy 4:12. Why did Paul write this to Timothy? Because Timothy was a young person trying to do right. I'll repeat the verse again, "Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in spirit, in faith, in purity." The verse is saying that you do not have to fall into youth stereotypes.
This leads me to my main point of all this, and that is one key word: Choices. If you are young or old, you alone have a choice. I do not think youth should just be stereotyped as some sort of rite of passage we all go through with inept capabilities. I believe we all make our own choices, starting in our youth. That is why Paul wrote this to Timothy. He was letting Timothy know that he did not have to fall into this trap of believing that he was "just a youth". He could very well make good decisions and actually become a leader right where he was. And I believe he did. Just the fact that Timothy was spending time with as good of an influence as Paul was a good choice in itself. It goes back to the idea that whoever you spend most of your time with is who you will become. Timothy definitely had the right idea with who he was using as an influence.
So, back to my example, and the sowing the wild oats example. Why is it that I have gotten this far in school? First of all, I have had the Lord's help, and He has guided me through all of it, without Him, I couldn't have done it. But secondly, I chose to study. You cannot just wake up one day and be able to explain how blood is pumped through the body. And yes, my young mind may help me retain facts, but determination keeps me studying. There are plenty of equally intellectually gifted people who do not chose to go to school. It is the same thing with the sowing the wild oats example. No one forces young people to experiment with destructive behaviors. If a teenager starts doing drugs, yes, they may have peer pressure, but ultimately it is their choice to take part in that. It is the same with anything like that. You choose, by your daily actions, what path you are going to take. You do not just fall into a path based on your age.
Choices. That word seems so simple, but when I think about it, that's how most people have gotten to where they are in their lives. Each day, we are faced with choices that may ultimately change the outcome of our future. And choices can really spiral into a lot more than you ever expected. I think youth is only wasted on the young, if the young choose to waste their youth. And what determines that, is simply the choices they make on a day to day basis.
I thought of this, and then I thought of the fact that so many times people use youth as general reason for people's actions, successes, and failures. For example, there are many young people I know that have drifted from the faith they once had. I have heard it said many times, "Oh, they're just young. Sowing their wild oats. They all do it." Youth is usually seen as a weakness. It's a time in life where you are supposed to have the best memory functioning, but the decision making part of your brain might not be at its finest moment. Stereotypically, youths are supposed to think they know it all, and make plenty of mistakes in the meantime. And if you are a young person who has miraculously done right things, or gone to school and succeed in it, well that's just because you have a young mind. Even George Bernard Shaw said, "Youth is wasted on the young." And he must be right....right?
Before I sound off on my thoughts on the issue, I am taken back to that Bible verse, in I Timothy 4:12. Why did Paul write this to Timothy? Because Timothy was a young person trying to do right. I'll repeat the verse again, "Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in spirit, in faith, in purity." The verse is saying that you do not have to fall into youth stereotypes.
This leads me to my main point of all this, and that is one key word: Choices. If you are young or old, you alone have a choice. I do not think youth should just be stereotyped as some sort of rite of passage we all go through with inept capabilities. I believe we all make our own choices, starting in our youth. That is why Paul wrote this to Timothy. He was letting Timothy know that he did not have to fall into this trap of believing that he was "just a youth". He could very well make good decisions and actually become a leader right where he was. And I believe he did. Just the fact that Timothy was spending time with as good of an influence as Paul was a good choice in itself. It goes back to the idea that whoever you spend most of your time with is who you will become. Timothy definitely had the right idea with who he was using as an influence.
So, back to my example, and the sowing the wild oats example. Why is it that I have gotten this far in school? First of all, I have had the Lord's help, and He has guided me through all of it, without Him, I couldn't have done it. But secondly, I chose to study. You cannot just wake up one day and be able to explain how blood is pumped through the body. And yes, my young mind may help me retain facts, but determination keeps me studying. There are plenty of equally intellectually gifted people who do not chose to go to school. It is the same thing with the sowing the wild oats example. No one forces young people to experiment with destructive behaviors. If a teenager starts doing drugs, yes, they may have peer pressure, but ultimately it is their choice to take part in that. It is the same with anything like that. You choose, by your daily actions, what path you are going to take. You do not just fall into a path based on your age.
Choices. That word seems so simple, but when I think about it, that's how most people have gotten to where they are in their lives. Each day, we are faced with choices that may ultimately change the outcome of our future. And choices can really spiral into a lot more than you ever expected. I think youth is only wasted on the young, if the young choose to waste their youth. And what determines that, is simply the choices they make on a day to day basis.
Friday, October 18, 2013
The Lie of the Easy
"Nothing is fast, quick, or easy unless you are going downhill." Sitting in Freedom Hall, in the midst of thousands of people, I felt like John Maxwell was speaking directly to me. It was as if he had just said, "Ashley, NOTHING is fast, quick, or easy, unless you are going downhill." This simple phrase spoke volumes of what I had been so deeply contemplating lately. You see, things in my life have been crazy lately. I have been working, going to nursing school (which is enough to drive someone insane by itself), and doing a million other things trying to build my future, and sometimes I wonder if i'm doing the right thing.
I question myself because, due to my generation and culture, I have the tendency to think that anything that happens to you should be easy, quick, painless even. That's the problem with this generation, most of us think that we should spend our college years taking things easy, be handed a diploma, walk into the job of our choice, and easily reside in the suburbs, with our high-school sweet hearts and two children we strategically planned to have exactly 5 years after marriage and 2 years apart. Oh, and to top it all off, we should be debt-free and comfortable with a minivan and leisure car of our choice.
And so, our generation buys into the "lie of the easy", and we second-guess ourselves when we have to even remotely put in work into anything. Even prior to the conference, I had a conversation with a friend who spoke about how she knew things were right in her life because everything was easy. This made me wonder, should everything be this hard? Should I be this busy? Is working this hard going to be worth it?
Then, John Maxwell said that phrase, and everything made sense. Think about what happens when you go downhill. You aren't meeting any resistance, and in fact your speed accelerates. The opposite is true when you are going uphill. It is a lot tougher trying to get to the top of a mountain than it is coming down from it. And do we think about where downhill leads? It usually leads to a valley, or a pit. Metaphorically speaking, is that where we want to be in our lives? Yes, we may think that the easy way will lead us to our goals, but does it really? Every time we refuse to work for something, where does that lead us? I think it leads us one step away from where we really want to be. Think back to the example I talked about earlier, with the suburbs and minivan. There is nothing wrong with wanting that, but how would we really feel with all that just handed to us? Would we be happy, or would we be like so many other Americans, and be empty, sad, burdened with debt, and not living the life we wanted. Think about this on the other hand, what if you spent your college years working hard, worked for your dreams, and worked your way into the job, position, or role that you wanted? What if you saved your money to buy a house, and maybe you did not have everything when everybody else did, but you put your money back to have a better life later on. What if you took your time to find the right spouse? Maybe you were not always in a relationship, but you took time and found the right person to spend your life with? What if you worked to make that relationship the best that it could be? Think of how much better all of this would make our future! With a little hard work now, and not sacrificing the permanent on the altar of the temporal, we could have a life that is actually meaningful and rewarding.
If we took a step back and really considered what even a little bit of work could do, maybe we would stop believing in this "easy lie". Taking a step back made me realize that, yes, things are really diffficult right now, but each moment I spend staying up late studying, when everyone else my age I know is out at the movies, is a moment that i'm using to build my future. This taking a step back just made me realize that in order to get where I want to be, I'm going to have to intentionally take steps to build my future. Nothing great in life that we want is going to just be handed to us. It is like that Hunter Hayes song that says, "I don't want good and I don't want good enough...I don't want easy, I want crazy." In order to get great, and not just good enough, things won't be easy. In fact, it just might be a little crazy.
I question myself because, due to my generation and culture, I have the tendency to think that anything that happens to you should be easy, quick, painless even. That's the problem with this generation, most of us think that we should spend our college years taking things easy, be handed a diploma, walk into the job of our choice, and easily reside in the suburbs, with our high-school sweet hearts and two children we strategically planned to have exactly 5 years after marriage and 2 years apart. Oh, and to top it all off, we should be debt-free and comfortable with a minivan and leisure car of our choice.
And so, our generation buys into the "lie of the easy", and we second-guess ourselves when we have to even remotely put in work into anything. Even prior to the conference, I had a conversation with a friend who spoke about how she knew things were right in her life because everything was easy. This made me wonder, should everything be this hard? Should I be this busy? Is working this hard going to be worth it?
Then, John Maxwell said that phrase, and everything made sense. Think about what happens when you go downhill. You aren't meeting any resistance, and in fact your speed accelerates. The opposite is true when you are going uphill. It is a lot tougher trying to get to the top of a mountain than it is coming down from it. And do we think about where downhill leads? It usually leads to a valley, or a pit. Metaphorically speaking, is that where we want to be in our lives? Yes, we may think that the easy way will lead us to our goals, but does it really? Every time we refuse to work for something, where does that lead us? I think it leads us one step away from where we really want to be. Think back to the example I talked about earlier, with the suburbs and minivan. There is nothing wrong with wanting that, but how would we really feel with all that just handed to us? Would we be happy, or would we be like so many other Americans, and be empty, sad, burdened with debt, and not living the life we wanted. Think about this on the other hand, what if you spent your college years working hard, worked for your dreams, and worked your way into the job, position, or role that you wanted? What if you saved your money to buy a house, and maybe you did not have everything when everybody else did, but you put your money back to have a better life later on. What if you took your time to find the right spouse? Maybe you were not always in a relationship, but you took time and found the right person to spend your life with? What if you worked to make that relationship the best that it could be? Think of how much better all of this would make our future! With a little hard work now, and not sacrificing the permanent on the altar of the temporal, we could have a life that is actually meaningful and rewarding.
If we took a step back and really considered what even a little bit of work could do, maybe we would stop believing in this "easy lie". Taking a step back made me realize that, yes, things are really diffficult right now, but each moment I spend staying up late studying, when everyone else my age I know is out at the movies, is a moment that i'm using to build my future. This taking a step back just made me realize that in order to get where I want to be, I'm going to have to intentionally take steps to build my future. Nothing great in life that we want is going to just be handed to us. It is like that Hunter Hayes song that says, "I don't want good and I don't want good enough...I don't want easy, I want crazy." In order to get great, and not just good enough, things won't be easy. In fact, it just might be a little crazy.
Friday, October 11, 2013
What Will You Do With Your Line?
Earlier today, I decided to watch Glee's tribute to Cory Monteith. Glee used to be one of the shows I watched all the time, and Cory's character, Finn Hudson, was my absolute favorite. His character had a calm, yet leading spirit, that I really liked, and even wanted to emulate in my own life. I saw that calm assurance, peace with strength spirit as one that I wanted myself.
Anyways, although I really liked the character and felt bad about this untimely death, that is not what struck me most about the episode. Yes, I was emotional; yes, I thought it was terrible that he died, but one simple conversation from the show halted me in my tracks. In the episode, the character Puckerman looked at a plaque that had Finn's birth year to death written out as such: 1994-2013. After that, the character said,"You know what's tripping me out? This line between the two years. That's his whole life. Everything that happened was in that line." The woman he was talking to just replied back, "What are you gonna do with your line now Puckerman?"
What are you gonna do with your line? Wow, what a line! All I could think about was the fact that we really only get that short little line. Regardless of how long we get, 20 years, 50 years, 70 years, the time between that line really is not that long. Everything that happens in our life will be in that short little line period. This especially struck me because it made me think, if my life ended tomorrow, I would have only had 21 years in that line. All I would have to show is what I've done in that time. No second chances, no redo's, no chance to get to do something I had not attempted yet. Each day, each moment, is a time we will never get back. I wondered, would I be satisfied with what I've done so far? Yes, I've accomplished some of my goals, but there are still things I want to do. There are still a lot of things that I want to accomplish in my lifetime. It made me think too, am I doing enough to accomplish those goals? Am I living my life in a way that I could say I used the line I was given effectively? Especially since no one knows how much of a line they will get.
So why do so many of us live each moment in mediocrity? Why do so many of us go through life just being normal, and not trying to reach our dreams? Why do so many of us "wait til tomorrow" to make things right with people we may be at odds with? Why do we live like we have all the time in the world? The answer has to do with the fact that many of us ignore the line. We ignore the fact that life is not something we are guaranteed. Every day is a gift. I'm not using this blog to bash anybody, by the way, all of the things I have said could be pointed right back at me. There have been moments and days that I have wasted. Yes, I have tried to be futuristic, and focus on what is important, but I have had moments when I failed to realize how important it was to live wisely with the "line" we are given.
The Bible even says in James 4:14,"Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away." None of us know what is coming next. For those of you who have lost someone you care about, how many times do you think, "If only I could have....", and you fill in the blanks with something that you will never get to do? I know I've done that. There are many times I think, if only I could drive my Pawpaw to church one more time. Yet, his time is over. He may have lived a long life by our standards, but if you think about it, even if you die in your 70's, your life is just a vapor.
So, what are you going to do with the line you get? It's a gift, but it's up to you to do something with it. Everything that is going to happen will happen in that line...no matter how long or short that line happens to be.
Anyways, although I really liked the character and felt bad about this untimely death, that is not what struck me most about the episode. Yes, I was emotional; yes, I thought it was terrible that he died, but one simple conversation from the show halted me in my tracks. In the episode, the character Puckerman looked at a plaque that had Finn's birth year to death written out as such: 1994-2013. After that, the character said,"You know what's tripping me out? This line between the two years. That's his whole life. Everything that happened was in that line." The woman he was talking to just replied back, "What are you gonna do with your line now Puckerman?"
What are you gonna do with your line? Wow, what a line! All I could think about was the fact that we really only get that short little line. Regardless of how long we get, 20 years, 50 years, 70 years, the time between that line really is not that long. Everything that happens in our life will be in that short little line period. This especially struck me because it made me think, if my life ended tomorrow, I would have only had 21 years in that line. All I would have to show is what I've done in that time. No second chances, no redo's, no chance to get to do something I had not attempted yet. Each day, each moment, is a time we will never get back. I wondered, would I be satisfied with what I've done so far? Yes, I've accomplished some of my goals, but there are still things I want to do. There are still a lot of things that I want to accomplish in my lifetime. It made me think too, am I doing enough to accomplish those goals? Am I living my life in a way that I could say I used the line I was given effectively? Especially since no one knows how much of a line they will get.
So why do so many of us live each moment in mediocrity? Why do so many of us go through life just being normal, and not trying to reach our dreams? Why do so many of us "wait til tomorrow" to make things right with people we may be at odds with? Why do we live like we have all the time in the world? The answer has to do with the fact that many of us ignore the line. We ignore the fact that life is not something we are guaranteed. Every day is a gift. I'm not using this blog to bash anybody, by the way, all of the things I have said could be pointed right back at me. There have been moments and days that I have wasted. Yes, I have tried to be futuristic, and focus on what is important, but I have had moments when I failed to realize how important it was to live wisely with the "line" we are given.
The Bible even says in James 4:14,"Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away." None of us know what is coming next. For those of you who have lost someone you care about, how many times do you think, "If only I could have....", and you fill in the blanks with something that you will never get to do? I know I've done that. There are many times I think, if only I could drive my Pawpaw to church one more time. Yet, his time is over. He may have lived a long life by our standards, but if you think about it, even if you die in your 70's, your life is just a vapor.
So, what are you going to do with the line you get? It's a gift, but it's up to you to do something with it. Everything that is going to happen will happen in that line...no matter how long or short that line happens to be.
Monday, September 30, 2013
Love. Cherish. Inspire. Dream!
"Love. Cherish. Inspire. Dream." Those were the words written on the ring my boyfriend slid on my finger. I looked at it, the silver design that was just my style, and I took in the words. He could not have picked something more fitting for me, and my life.
You see, for a long time, i've been working through, in my mind and by my actions, figuring out the direction of my life. I'm 21, in nursing school, working toward that dream, but I feel like I am called to be so much in my life. It's just the process of trying to pinpoint specific things that I need to do that is difficult. Lately, I also have had the opportunity--and I do not take this lightly--to give advice, and to help people in various ways. Another thing to add to the mix is that I love to write, but I don't get a lot of opportunities to write with the schedule that I have.
So, I've been thinking lately...how can I incorporate my crazy life, my love for writing, and helping people into a central place? That's when I had the idea to start a different blog. I already had one blog that I just posted on every now and then, but I wanted something to actually work on. A way to reach out, a way to express my emotions, even help myself on my path of growth.
And so, here we are. The purpose of what i'm about to write, so whoever reading can understand where I am coming from, and what to expect. I will be posting one or two times a week, and if anyone has anything they'd like as a new topic, just comment.
Anyways, so i'll start with Love. Cherish. Inspire. Dream. What do these words mean to me? Love--it's more than just an over-used four letter word. Love is knowing that you would do something for someone else for no gain of your own, just to make their life a little easier. Love is caring for someone more than you care for yourself. Love is more than just a fleeting feeling that comes and goes with your mood for the day. Perfect love is one that according the Bible, "casteth out fear". I won't lie, it took me a while to grasp this. As a teenager, I heard love talked about, but I did not really understand it. I said I loved people that I really didn't. (And I don't mean just dating relationships) The feeling I had, though, was empty, meaningless, and if I lost that supposed love, the only reason I got upset was that my pride was broken. I didn't date a lot, but there were times I stayed with people I didn't even really want to be with just because I didn't want that broken pride feeling, and I didn't want to be lonely. That is not a good place to be. I determined that in my life, I wanted more than that. I wanted to love people, care for others, make others lives even just a little easier. Love is something everyone needs in their life, but so many people have lost what it really is. It's so much more than a feeling.
What about the word Cherish? I looked it up and it means, "to value something highly, to protect it". This made me think about all the things in my life that I need to value highly, things that I need to protect. I need to value my relationship with the Lord. Without a daily, committed, personal relationship to the Lord, nothing else matters. I need to value the wonderful people God has placed in my life. I need to value my dreams (which we will get to soon). I need to value my goals, my education, my home, my daily blessings. I need to protect my values, protect my mind, protect what I stand for. It takes daily action, but it is necessary.
Inspire. What inspires me and who do I inspire? For the first part of that question, I think it is very important to choose wisely what inspires you. I know it may sound selfish, but you can't just let anyone or anything inspire you. I have learned from some reading that you will only be as successful as the five people closest to you. That's why in school if you study with five people that are failing, chances are, you'll be failing, too. So why do we constantly surround ourselves that are failing life? I don't think there's any problem allowing ourselves to be picky with the friends we keep, the people we are inspired by, and the people we want to teach us something. That is a double-edged sword, though. If we are determined to be that picky with our own influences, we owe it to ourselves and those around us to create in ourselves a certain standard that others can be inspired by. And I don't mean just avoiding being what you see as a failure. I mean not being just a mediocre member of society. It's kind of like the concept that all it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing--all it takes for you to be, well for lack of a better word, blah, nothing, average, in your own life is to do nothing. Don't work on improving yourself, watch the average six hours of television a day, be mediocre, and that's what you will inspire--mediocrity.
The final word is dream. What is a dream? A dream is something that people have given their lives for to even get just a chance to accomplish. Sadly, many people gave up on dreaming a long time ago. They see dreaming in the same way they see Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty. Fairy-tale like coincidental occurances that only happen to you if you are the star of a Disney movie. Dreams are not like that though. They may seem impossible, but isn't that the good part about them? You can work through struggle after struggle, and accomplish something. There is nothing like the feeling of accomplishment. It's the feeling I get every time I finish a semester of nursing school. I get that feeling because I know I've worked my hardest, and I reached a milestone. The dream may not be realized yet, but I got a step closer. Small accomplishments give you some drive to go on a few steps further. I'll share a couple of my dreams now. I will become a nurse. I will go on a medical missions trip and help those in need. I will inspire at least one other life. I will get published. I will achieve a certain level in the business i've been doing. There are others, but I thought just a few will give an idea of what my dreams involve. Notice also I say, "I will". Because I have faith and belief that it will happen.
Everything I write will have one of these themes I just mentioned. These are four priniciples that define and help guide my life. I hope, too, for all of you who read, you find something helpful and learn to Love, Cherish, Inspire, and Dream. Keep these before you, and become the best you that you can possibly be.
You see, for a long time, i've been working through, in my mind and by my actions, figuring out the direction of my life. I'm 21, in nursing school, working toward that dream, but I feel like I am called to be so much in my life. It's just the process of trying to pinpoint specific things that I need to do that is difficult. Lately, I also have had the opportunity--and I do not take this lightly--to give advice, and to help people in various ways. Another thing to add to the mix is that I love to write, but I don't get a lot of opportunities to write with the schedule that I have.
So, I've been thinking lately...how can I incorporate my crazy life, my love for writing, and helping people into a central place? That's when I had the idea to start a different blog. I already had one blog that I just posted on every now and then, but I wanted something to actually work on. A way to reach out, a way to express my emotions, even help myself on my path of growth.
And so, here we are. The purpose of what i'm about to write, so whoever reading can understand where I am coming from, and what to expect. I will be posting one or two times a week, and if anyone has anything they'd like as a new topic, just comment.
Anyways, so i'll start with Love. Cherish. Inspire. Dream. What do these words mean to me? Love--it's more than just an over-used four letter word. Love is knowing that you would do something for someone else for no gain of your own, just to make their life a little easier. Love is caring for someone more than you care for yourself. Love is more than just a fleeting feeling that comes and goes with your mood for the day. Perfect love is one that according the Bible, "casteth out fear". I won't lie, it took me a while to grasp this. As a teenager, I heard love talked about, but I did not really understand it. I said I loved people that I really didn't. (And I don't mean just dating relationships) The feeling I had, though, was empty, meaningless, and if I lost that supposed love, the only reason I got upset was that my pride was broken. I didn't date a lot, but there were times I stayed with people I didn't even really want to be with just because I didn't want that broken pride feeling, and I didn't want to be lonely. That is not a good place to be. I determined that in my life, I wanted more than that. I wanted to love people, care for others, make others lives even just a little easier. Love is something everyone needs in their life, but so many people have lost what it really is. It's so much more than a feeling.
What about the word Cherish? I looked it up and it means, "to value something highly, to protect it". This made me think about all the things in my life that I need to value highly, things that I need to protect. I need to value my relationship with the Lord. Without a daily, committed, personal relationship to the Lord, nothing else matters. I need to value the wonderful people God has placed in my life. I need to value my dreams (which we will get to soon). I need to value my goals, my education, my home, my daily blessings. I need to protect my values, protect my mind, protect what I stand for. It takes daily action, but it is necessary.
Inspire. What inspires me and who do I inspire? For the first part of that question, I think it is very important to choose wisely what inspires you. I know it may sound selfish, but you can't just let anyone or anything inspire you. I have learned from some reading that you will only be as successful as the five people closest to you. That's why in school if you study with five people that are failing, chances are, you'll be failing, too. So why do we constantly surround ourselves that are failing life? I don't think there's any problem allowing ourselves to be picky with the friends we keep, the people we are inspired by, and the people we want to teach us something. That is a double-edged sword, though. If we are determined to be that picky with our own influences, we owe it to ourselves and those around us to create in ourselves a certain standard that others can be inspired by. And I don't mean just avoiding being what you see as a failure. I mean not being just a mediocre member of society. It's kind of like the concept that all it takes for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing--all it takes for you to be, well for lack of a better word, blah, nothing, average, in your own life is to do nothing. Don't work on improving yourself, watch the average six hours of television a day, be mediocre, and that's what you will inspire--mediocrity.
The final word is dream. What is a dream? A dream is something that people have given their lives for to even get just a chance to accomplish. Sadly, many people gave up on dreaming a long time ago. They see dreaming in the same way they see Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty. Fairy-tale like coincidental occurances that only happen to you if you are the star of a Disney movie. Dreams are not like that though. They may seem impossible, but isn't that the good part about them? You can work through struggle after struggle, and accomplish something. There is nothing like the feeling of accomplishment. It's the feeling I get every time I finish a semester of nursing school. I get that feeling because I know I've worked my hardest, and I reached a milestone. The dream may not be realized yet, but I got a step closer. Small accomplishments give you some drive to go on a few steps further. I'll share a couple of my dreams now. I will become a nurse. I will go on a medical missions trip and help those in need. I will inspire at least one other life. I will get published. I will achieve a certain level in the business i've been doing. There are others, but I thought just a few will give an idea of what my dreams involve. Notice also I say, "I will". Because I have faith and belief that it will happen.
Everything I write will have one of these themes I just mentioned. These are four priniciples that define and help guide my life. I hope, too, for all of you who read, you find something helpful and learn to Love, Cherish, Inspire, and Dream. Keep these before you, and become the best you that you can possibly be.
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